Sunday, December 25th, 2005
9:12 am	baby jesus... born to rock At 2:30am last night, I made what is quite possibly the worst video ecard in mankind's history. But I do want to wish everybody a very merry christmas!!!! Here you go, shield your eyes: http://www.moderndaymonsters.com/finished.WMV
Wednesday, December 21st, 2005
11:26 pm	part 3 of.. the ride. so, when i first took my car in a month and a half ago to Dodd's Service Center, they couldn't find any problems with the cooling system. they were clearly wrong. apparantly, the water pump that i had installed last summer had no blades inside anymore. so that wasn't doing it's job, which caused my radiator to basically "pop" and explode. so today i had to have installed a water pump and a radiator. i feel as though if Dodd's Service Center had done their job a month ago that i'd have a radiator still even if i didn't have a water pump. and since i did a bunch of other stuff a month ago, it should have been cheaper labor as well. but instead, i'm out $850. this makes me not happy. so tomorrow morning i'm going to go talk to the owner of Dodd's Service Center, and hope that he helps me out in some way. if he doesn't, check back here and i'll let you know the name of the shop (Dodd's Service Center) so you know never to go there. they currently have a sterling reputation, but after being sold a bunch of stuff that didn't solve my immediate problem, and then having more stuff break cause it wasn't fixed and having to pay more for that... i don't know if they deserve a good rep. i'll let you know. (obviously, Dodd's Service Center didn't help me out. at all. they just told me that if it wasn't acting up when i was there, there was nothing they could do. yeah, thanks.)
Tuesday, December 20th, 2005
5:44 pm	car, pt. 2 ok, if you've read the blog below, you know that december 19th was a pretty bad day. oh, but it wasn't even close to over. about a block from my apt last night, on my way back from work, i heard a popping sound come from my engine and a large puff of white smoke came POURING out from under my hood. and radiator fluid was everywhere. ugh. sooo, here's the update. my car's in the shop, and the radiator's hosed (get it? hosed? ha.) so they replaced that. they still are showing a coolant pressure leak though and they don't know why or where. they're figuring it out, and hopefully they won't charge me too much more. on the upside, i had multiple offers from friends for car stereos as gifts, and so my friend tim is going to both help install some glass i found for my window from a junkyard, and install his old car stereo (from his ex-gf, the drama-radio continues to exist in my vehicle) in my car as well. all in all, i'll probably lose about $550-650 on account of my car this week. but that's what credit cards are for. thank you to everyone who's been supportive and helping me out. i love you all.
Monday, December 19th, 2005
8:59 am	merry christmas to you, ...the person who stole my car stereo last night! i didn't really need the mid-section of my dash attached... i don't have heat or a/c in the car anyway. it was so nice of you to rip that out for me. and you didn't even cross any wires and drain my battery! that's talent. it's not like listening to music in my car is the only thing that makes that car bearable. now i can listen to the whistling of the wind without that pesky back window. nature is such a pleasant sound. don't know why i didn't think of that sooner. and how did you know that i'd gotten that as a christmas gift two years ago from a guy that dumped me in texas with nowhere to go? you must have known that stereo had painful memories attached. really, you're better than a therapist. my favorite winter coat was a gift from him... would you like that as well? it's banana republic, i'd bet you could sell it for $25 at buffalo exchange. ... in all seriousness, i need to be thankful that whoever took my stereo didn't take my cds as well. it's not going to be fun to have to replace that tiny back window, and less fun to not have music in my car anymore... but i still have a car. i can only hope that the person who sells it uses the money for christmas presents and not crack or strippers. guess i'll never know.
7:04 am	captain oblivious last night, at about 10pm, i forgot i owned a toaster, even though it was in front of me. yeah.
Tuesday, December 13th, 2005
10:35 pm	this is a warning if i've told you you're getting a christmas gift from me, then i've probably already bought it. this is a warning. in the style of strong bad/teen girl squad... you're clearance'd!!! that's right. this year i spent full price on almost nothing. i scoured the racks of the department stores and malls and even ross, digging through to find the most hideous and tacky christmas gifts i could find. then, when i got them home, i assigned them to who they best fit. yeah, it's the thought that counts doesn't really apply in this case... but hopefully you'll be as amused as i am.
Monday, December 12th, 2005
8:40 am	for jeremy and jessica Death by caffeine! Find out how much of your favorite drink it would take to kill you! http://www.energyfiend.com/death-by-caffeine/
Saturday, December 10th, 2005
12:49 am	what i want for christmas i put up my christmas tree tonight. i had some help from a friend (which is good, cause i was planning to haul a six foot christmas tree up the stairs by myself, and i'm not sure if that would have worked). it made me happy, for a bit. i like christmas. but christmas also makes me very deeply sad. i've gotten old, and very sad. that being said, this is what i want for christmas this year: i want world peace. real world peace. no genocides. no religious wars. no civil wars. peace. i want peace. i want to like myself again. it's been awhile. i want to be able to enjoy my life. i remember when i did, but i don't remember why i did. as much as austin's done for me, i feel as though it's ruined me as well. i shouldn't blame this city though.. i've ruined myself. i lost all the good parts of my personality, all the things i used to like. didn't i used to be caring and kind and loyal? where did that go? why didn't i notice when it all went away?? i want political and social leaders to act like leaders instead of whiny, foolish little babies with nothing but their own interests in mind. i want the christian right to act christian for once. i want a government by the people for the people instead of by the wealthy for the wealthy. i want a 3+ party system. i want to see christmas put back in the holiday season, and christ put back in christmas. i'm 25 years old. i don't really care about santa claus or presents anymore. all this holiday holds for me is family, friends, trees, lights, and love. i know these are not politically correct things to say. i don't care. and yes. i'm mad at target. i want love. with someone worth spending the effort on. i want my family and friends to know that i love them all, even if i've lost the ability to show it.
Wednesday, November 23rd, 2005
7:33 am	i'm gone for thanksgiving subject says it all. call my cell or email me if you need to track me down... but warned that cellphones don't always work where my parents live, and they're on dial up too. wahoo. have a happy thanksgiving everybody! don't eat too much turkey! tryptophan... gobble gobble zzzz.
Sunday, November 20th, 2005
6:22 pm	goodbye gunter gunter the wunder fish is no longer. i buried him out by the stairwell of my apt complex. i pray that his fish spirit is at peace. and that the stray cats don't dig him up. i cried. i've been crying anyway. but i cried for him. i was a bad pet-owner.
Thursday, November 10th, 2005
8:02 pm	on what's been up. this is what's been up. i got in a fight with a friend but it's blown over. it's hard because i want to make sure i balance myself... not be too pushy, nor be a pushover. i got angry though, for the first time in a long time. i'm glad it's better. in the last year (11 months to be accurate), and i usually avoid mentioning this sort of thing, i had this boyfriend for like four months, and then that ended, and then i had another boyfriend within a month, and that lasted 2-3 months, and ended, and then i dated this guy for a couple months, and that ended, and then i dated this guy for a month, and that ended. endings cause me pain. so i have 11 months of hope and endings. i want it to stop. so either i need to not date, or... i guess there is no or. there's no such thing as no risk. guess i'll be lonely then. i've grown away from church and my church friends. i haven't really talked about this except to tell people that i took a break. i tried to go back, and i think it didn't work. i think at this point i want to take up some kind of volunteer work but i'm not sure if it's good for me to be involved in the church. i don't know. some of the people in my church group really let me down. i never like to be in a situation where i both feel bad when i hang out with someone or a group of people (on account of things they do or say in a condescending manner) but then also feel obligated to be around them. i guess that's why i cut out, but i don't know how to get close to those i do appreciate in that crowd, and also how to get close to god. my apartment has had issues, and it's usually uncomfortable to live here. as cheap as it is i think i may have to find a better place in july. i don't want to slow down my debt-pay-off schedule, but i don't want to be constantly frustrated either. my a/c doesn't work. half my sink doesn't work. the laundry room doesn't have lights. and on, and on, and on. i get paid tomorrow, which is good because i only have $35 in my checking and $5 in cash. i've had enough food and gas to last me the week, but it makes me so nervous to live like this. i wonder how long i should work at my job before i ask for a raise. it's been 4 months so far.. i'm still a temp worker, but it seems like if i'm there awhile i should get some kind of extra cash. i haven't been feeling well lately, in this really generic head and tummy way. before that it was generic back pains too. it's kept me from exercising (and i've kept me from exercising as well). i need to get going on that. pageant's in a mere 5 months. i'm not having really big ups and downs, i feel ok most of the time. when i don't feel ok, it's because i feel invisible. it's partly the guy problem. i want somebody to be into me. i don't want it to be a one way street, i want to be into them too, but i want to feel appreciated for me. that's something that hasn't happened in a long time. i can live without it, but it makes it harder. i've recently considered becoming a hermit. i don't think that'd help though. this guy i know only over the internet and phone jokingly asked me to marry him the other day. it felt nice to pretend for a minute. i think i must be getting old. i'm flying home for thanksgiving. my sister is massively pregnant and i should hopefully see a lot of my family. i think it'll do me some good. going home usually does... though it also usually does me some bad too. it's an odd relationship i have with them. they love me, but i'm definitely different. i don't think they even know how different i am. they always want me to move home... but why? i could never lead the kind of interesting life i have in austin in a place like upstate ny. even if sometimes i'm too broke to live my interesting life here. at least i can mooch off the good free stuff. like the texas book festival. and the greenbelt. i went to mckinney park and hiked around last weekend. i had this idea... a decent idea... it might work into something. we'll see. i think that's it. i think that sums up the last couple months. i guess i'll go ramble somewhere else now...
Saturday, October 29th, 2005
7:00 pm	A halloween retrospective. The following is every Halloween costume pictures I've been able to dig up. Some are poor images. One way or another, it cannot be helped. 1983ish - Meow! 1988 - Grape Soda. The most amazing costume my mom ever made me. I should point out that in 1989 I was a pencil, which was highly uncomfortable. No pics though. 1996 - Sailor Mercury. I used to looove the Sailor Moon series. Fortunately, we all grow up, don't we? 1999 - Queen Amidala. And the rest of the Stars Wars Episode 1 group. 2000 - A really dumb looking fairy. With Jon the Bucaneer and Andy as Fidel Castro. 2003 - Ladybug. Got it at the kids section of Kmart. Bet you didn't know there were Kmarts still open, huh? 2004 - Payphone. Anybody got a quarter? As shown with Evans as... Evans, and Jeremy as Strong Bad. 2005 - First I was a puppet show. Then I was batgirl. I just couldn't make up my mind I guess. Puppet Show - Face Puppet Show - Body Batgirl Face Batgirl Full Length
Monday, October 24th, 2005
10:25 pm	my mom has a blog! My mom seriously has a blog. She's so cute. She has it to promote her Discount Bridal Veils site. So I guess if anybody here's in the market for that kind of stuff, check her out. I'm obviously not in that market, like, ever. Me and her got into a "discussion" about abortion on the phone tonight. She always makes points with her heart, and I love her for it. She'd make a terrible lawyer, but I can't see how that's a bad thing to say about anyone. I've had, on occasion, had people tell me I'd make a pretty good lawyer. That's definitely not the kind of thing I'd want said at my funeral. "Too bad she did 'x' with her life, she'dve made a great lawyer." Yikes. Ok, I'm totally off track now. Time to sleep. Happy blogging to all, and to all a good blog.
Thursday, October 20th, 2005
7:33 pm	24 hours on craigslist i saw 24 hours on craigslist at the drafthouse last night. it was pretty zany. there's a lot of weeeiiiird people on there. but anyway, i started to think about all the things i'd done on craigslist. let's make a list, ok? reverse chronilogical order, to the best of my ability. -sold my ACL ticket (+$140) -bought my futon mattress ($40) -bought my kitchen table ($25) -found my current job -found my current apartment -made a friend, who later turned into a boyfriend, who later borrowed two of my dvds and disappeared -bought a graphing calculator ($20) -made a friend, and i broke his sink, and then he moved out of the area so we don't talk much anymore, but he's my lj friend -went to many, many garage sales well, i guess that's it. craigslist has altered and added to large chunks of my life in texas. anybody else have a craigslist story?
Thursday, October 13th, 2005
6:31 pm	this week, in 4 x 4. last week i had zero pairs of sunglasses. this week i have three. i only bought one. the other two pairs just... reappeared. my car broke last weekend on the way back from mexico. it was a radiator hose. i fixed it. i felt useful. i almost got into a car accident yesterday. i was in a traffic circle. another car decided he wanted to be in the traffic circle too. he was wrong. last night i went to walgreens. i went for barrettes. i also walked out with a $2 tshirt and a plastic ninja sword. i'm not really sure why. the end.
Sunday, October 9th, 2005
1:40 pm	teeth I went to Mexico yesterday (yes, yesterday, all day, left at 3:30am early Sat morning and got back 2am Sat night/Sun morn) to go to the dentist. There was more than one reason. First off, I'm vain, and I was tired of having ugly teeth. So I wanted whitening. Secondly, my front tooth is fake and was the wrong color, had a chip on the side and a mysterious brown spot I wanted checked out. I decided it was time to replace it. Thirdly, I hadn't been to a dentist in three years... so it was time for a cleaning. Hooray. So I went. And I'm glad I did. My teeth are whiter, my front tooth was done properly (it was apparantely just "resin" which is not how you're supposed to fix a broken tooth. Broken teeth are generally either done as crowns or veneers. I now have a veneer.), oh and that brown spot? Yeah, that was some kind of cavity/rotting tooth issue. So that has been ground away. Are my teeth supermodel beautiful? No. Are they noticeably nicer? Yes. I think, in the end, I'm just happy to be able to smile in pictures and not be upset at the outcome. Someday, I'll save up some money and do that whole crazy cosmetic veneer thing maybe... but in the meantime, this is good enough. I've also had these spots on my teeth since I had braces years ago, and I was told it was calcification on my teeth, but the dentist told me yesterday that it was actually resin left on my teeth from the braces and then flouridation that was attracted to the resin. So he ground it off. The "resin" I mean. Was he right? I'll never know. But if there are no adverse side effects from what he did (and so far my teeth feel just fine, which is shocking since I spent over five hours in the chair yesterday), then who cares what that stuff was? I don't. Frankly, I've had to deal with, for the last ten years, the result of my orthodontist saying "Yeah, your teeth are straighter now, but oh by the way those spots are irrepairable." Yeah, thanks. Anyway, pictures below. Let me know what you think. Honestly and truthfully. This is the website for the dentist. He charged $415 for a porcelin veneer, laser whitening and a cleaning. You must email him for an appointment if you want the pricing listed on his webpage. He gives that discount for those who come from far away as he understands about gas $ and possibly hotel $ (they normally don't do the kind of work they do on me in one day). This is the picture that made me realize I needed to go to the dentist for some cosmetic work: This is the before picture taken yesterday morning. This is the after picture, taken this morning, of my new smile.
Monday, September 26th, 2005
1:29 pm	ACL wrap-up Day 1 (or should I say Night 1) I took a nap when I got home from work, which meant I missed all the early scheduled stuff like spoon or allman brothers or whatever else was early on. Whatever. I didn't really care. I got a nap. So I sleepily made my way down to 18th and Brazos and parked and power-walked my way to the bus. I was so afraid I was going to be late for Keane. Cuttin' it close, I was! On the way in I saw my old roommate Chase scalping tickets. That's his job. He's a ticket scalper. We used work together at Dell, but he prefers to hustle tickets, and I prefer a job that doesn't suck (such as the one I currently have. Pretty much lacks in sucking). I hung out for a couple minutes, but Oh! Keane! And I was off like that rabbit in Alice in Wonderland. Keane = awesome. Very good. Wonderful. The one odd thing I did notice is that the singer's voice, live at least, sounds very much like Freddie Mercury. He could have burst right into "Galileo! Galileo!" and it would have sounded perfect. But anyway. Awesome show. Then, off to the Black Crowes. On the way over I grabbed a Philly cheesesteak sandwich from Texadelphia, which was a wise choice. I ate another one on Sunday even. So good. So, the Black Crowes. I gotta say, I don't really care about them. They're ok and all.. but I wandered off about halfway through. I had a huge line to stand in for the shuttle bus back anyway, so it's not like I actually missed the rest of their set or anything. On the way out I saw my old coworker Jill, and her brother and wife and some of their friends. We hung out and caught up on the way back which was cool. She's good people. Day 2 (or the story of how sometimes I'm a good daughter) So before I went to ACL on Saturday, I decided to do all those weekend things I usually need to do. Like laundry. Errands. Dishes. Call my mom. And I did call my mom. And she was all upset over... pretty much everything. Actually, most of the things she was upset about were pretty valid. Some doctor is being a real jerk to her about some test she needs to have. He's basically being greedy and telling her he won't do it because her insurance company won't pay him full price for it. I thought that was illegal or something. Ugh. Doctors. Anyway, I talked to my mom, and then I called my sister and left her a msg about mom, and then talked to my mom again after she'd talked to my sister, and then talked to my sister on AIM... and then everybody was happy. And my laundry was done. Hooray. Time for music. Mike Doughty's Band: Mike Doughty, for those unaware, was the singer for Soul Coughing. He's a really awesome singer, and a real jerk in person. How do I know this? I saw him last year at Stubb's and bought a CD off him. But regardless of his interpersonal demeanor, his show rocked. For some reason he had a different band than last year, but I think that actually helped somewhat. More people in it and all. Plus they did a cover of "Hungry like the wolf" which was somewhere between hilarious and cool. For being him being such a jerk, I sure did develop a crush on him real quick during that set. Ha. The Frames: My ex-boyfriend claims I saw them at SXSW at an emo's day show, but I was so sick with bronchitis I don't rememeber it at all. Then again, I barely rememeber this show, from just two days ago, so maybe the problem is not my memory. They were definitely not bad or awful or anything. And I liked hearing that song I hear on WBER all the time. And I was glad they drove from Dallas to Austin in two hours, by whatever miracle made that possible so they could get to the show. I just, you know, saw better stuff this weekend. Let's get to it. The Walkmen: Were one of those better bands. They were fantastic. Awesome. Superb. However, their drummer makes crazy monkey faces while drumming, which made it very hard for me to not laugh. I think if Evans ever starts drumming he will make similar faces. Jet: You ever randomly catch a band at a show, that has one or two songs out, and realize they sound nothing like the rest of their singles? Or alternatively, experience that with an album... singles are completely different from the rest of it? Yeah, that would be Jet. Bloc Party: Um, well, I recall them as being good, but I've totally forgotten why. Exhaustion had gotten to me by that point. Oasis: I was hoping for a fist fight. I was denied, but I did hear them dedicate one of their songs to "That building that looks like an owl. Don't tell me you've never f-ing noticed". They also dedicated Wonderwall to "all the ugly chicks everywhere". Charming, guys. They did sing something that got to me though. Live Forever. I had blocked out that song and its existance. I had forgotten they even sang it. But then, there it was, with a whole flood of memories about a whole lot of things that I don't even want to think about. My Saturday definitely ended on a down note... (no pun intended). Day 3 (or how I learned to stop worrying and love the dust) There was dust. Lots of dust. And it was 108 degrees out. The setting. I barely remember watching the doves, as I was sitting under a tree recovering from the long walk to ACL. I should point out at this time that I actually parked between the onramp to Mopac and Mopac, on this grassy hill median. I have a picture somewhere. If you're ever on Bee Caves and then take Mopac North, look to the left as you're getting on Mopac. Yes, there. My car barely made it up the enbankment. To continue. Doves. Barely remember them. Bravery. Barely listened to them (are they popular? I don't even know. I assume so. I thought they were too derivative. Just not original at all. Oh well). So I took some time to walk around. Get some water. And then work my way up in the crowd at The Arcade Fire show. OMG THE ARCADE FIRE WAS AMAZING. Easily one of the best shows I've seen in the last five years. Ask anyone else who was there and they'll tell you the same thing. Ask anyone who was at the Coldplay show later on and they'll tell you all about how Coldplay wouldn't shut up about how great the arcade fire show was. (During Clocks, that night, the singer dude actually changed the words to "going higher and higher everybody listen to the arcade fire). Yeah. I was lucky enough to be close enough to the stage so that I was in the shade and not the 108 degree weather directly, and people were cool and the show was cool and everything was cool enough that I didn't pass out. And then, the Decemberists. I was impressed. I was more than impressed. I was really sad they didn't have more of a crowd. I was rather intrigued by the interactive nature of the show. First the singer dude had us all kneel down during this quiet part of a song. This one guy wouldn't get down so people started throwing bottles at him. And then we all got to scream like we were getting eaten by a whale. Where else are you going to get to do that? Honestly. But yeah, it was darn good. So basically, after that show it was 6:30 in the evening and still really hot, though probably not 108 anymore. I wanted to see Franz Ferdinand, so I walked over to the other stage and put my blanket down... and nearly fell asleep. So I really have no idea if they were good or not, I was kinda out of it. Nobody stepped on me though, so that was good. After they were done I got some food and wandered around.. and then the dust came. Oh, the dust. The dust had always been there, all weekend, but somehow it was now worse. I started breathing through my hat. I staked out a spot to watch coldplay, and curled up in a little ball and breathed through my hat, and didn't stand up until about a half hour into coldplay. Coldplay was fantastic, the stupid sorority girls I was standing next to for part of the show were not. NOTE: It is not acceptable to scream into your cell phone whilst other people are trying to watch a musical event of any kind. It's like a movie. Go away if you're going to yell into your stupid cell phone THAT COLDPLAY IS PLAYING. COLDPLAY. NO, COLDPLAY. HERE CLOCKS IS PLAYING LISTEN! CAN YOU HEAR IT? CLOCKS.... yeah that got on my nerves real quick. That is what they invented text messages for. Anyway, I left as Coldplay was doing their encore and made my way home... Someone parked behind me on that embankment so I got to experience pulling directly onto Mopac from my parking spot. Miraculously, two lanes were empty as I pulling out. I got home in time for my bedtime and it was good. The End :) Epilogue: Due to dust, I coughed up dirt for two days. I heard the dust even made the news as a verified medical issue among ACL-goers. Next year we've been promised astroturf (j/k).
Monday, September 12th, 2005
9:44 pm	top three all time best bible study quotes 3) He went on the Biblical Magical Mystery Tour -Brian 2) So those were like... Jesus Cheez-its -Me 1) Breasts are like martinis, two is not enough and three is too many -Tim
Monday, August 29th, 2005
9:34 am	hurry-cane If it keeps on raining, levee's gonna to break, If it keeps on raining, levee's gonna to break, When the levee breaks I'll have no place to stay. Good luck Louisiana + Mississippi!
Sunday, August 21st, 2005
12:56 pm	for you, morgan. http://conversatron.com/convers.py?topic=108391&count=3 now you're famous! sucker.
Sunday, August 14th, 2005
8:49 pm	i'm really starting to hate sundays i mean, really. most sundays i sit here, dazed, bored, a little sad, more than a little thoughtful... i'm just waiting for the week to begin. i get all caught in my head, and i usually don't have anyone to talk to, and i usually don't want to wish this mood on anyone anyway. so i sink a little.. and i sink a little more... and then i sleep, and wait for monday. i read 'the hours' tonight. i liked it. never saw the movie. don't know if i'll bother. i guess i should point out that this weekend i hit a couch with my car. don't worry, it was a low speed collision. but i did have to go out today and finangle my bumper back into place. i also went to jeremy and jess's wedding shower thing. i won a game of uno, which was pretty cool i guess. i don't get as excited winning a game of chance as i do winning a game of skill. i like to work for wins. i guess i'll go take my third walk of the day. i never even turned on my car today. should have gone grocery shopping, but didn't. at least i did manage to clean and cook a little.
Friday, August 5th, 2005
7:21 am	another fantastic update. i take lots of long walks in hyde park now. and that's really good, except i almost got hit by a van the other night while i was crossing 38 1/2th. i totally had the right of way too. i am not sorry to say that i flipped the dude off. i found out yesterday that i get labor day off, so i have a three day weekend in a couple weeks, and i have have a four day weekend for thanksgiving. that means thanksgiving will be the first holiday i've been with family for in two and a half years. and i get to see my sister all 7 months pregnant! i'm super excited. i've been hanging up posters and things at my new place. anyone that's even been to my domicile knows "things" means "anything that's brightly colored and will attach to my wall with sticky-tack". so. feel free to give me stuff to hang on my wall. stick people drawn on construction paper is especially needed at this time. my boss at work said that i was a "high potential person". i was simultaneously crushed by the expectations, elated by the compliment, and grossed out from the business-speak. i'm a weirdo. gunter the wunder fish is still alive. it's a miracle. cooking a "real meal" is hard, but not as hard as i thought it'd be. and the food i make comes out edible. so. i'm going to try to make more meals. anybody have any suggestions for things i should try to make? i watched the day the earth stood still last night with this guy i'm like, seeing or whatever. that movie is... really good, in a 50s way. even better, if you remember the context of what life was like in 1951. the one thing that did bother me, and amuse me, at the same time, was the total lack of black people in the crowd scenes in the movie. there were like, two. and the movie's set in D.C. totally whitewashed. anyway. time to go to work. casual friday means i'm wearing jeans, which is awesome. :)
Monday, July 18th, 2005
10:40 pm	and now, a second more personal entry. this is what's up. i like my new job. and someone there spontaneously called me "k" today, which is my nickname from college, if a letter can be a nickname. fond memories of alex with that one letter. funny, that. i like not being at my old job even more. i think in a few weeks i'll actually like humanity again. i'm single again. it's sad, but not too sad. i know it was better for that relationship to end, but i really don't like to see things end. now i'm just lonely, you know? i'm just kinda trapped in my own head sometimes. i'm thinking about getting in shape. i got out cross training for dummies out of the library. i don't really know what cross training is, so i think the book applies. anybody have any other recommendations? i'm a little confused as to where my updated new driver's license is. i ordered it like weeks ago. as per someone's request: please everyone do some reading on ethanol as a renewable fuel source. it could be good. if brazil can do it... that's it for tonight. i'm already past my bedtime. -k
10:19 pm	more bible fun. ah, exodus. see, like, moses was really whiny until the whole plagues thing started happening. he was all like "god, i don't wanna. god, tell somebody else to do it. god, i've got a stutter." well let me tell you what, if you've got a burning bush talking to you (and i'm not talking about ol' w trying to bbq) you'd better do what the burning bush says. cause either god's telling you to get right on it or you're so far up the loony tree you might as well risk your neck to save your people anyway. so moses does his thing, and sends a bunch of plagues (the plague of boils is my favorite, really) and delivers the jews from the pharoah... which of course the egyptians promptly write out of their history since apparantely it's rather embarrassing to have 600,000 people suddenly give you the finger and leave your land. well supposedly. ok, so then everybody eats sugar waffles that fall out of the sky, and moses goes back to burning bush land (i'm getting the giggles from more mental images of 'w') and god shows up with the ten commandments. simple, right? not really. apparantely the catholic version of the ten commandments i grew up with is different from both the hebrew and protestant versions. they're all seriously mashed up. there's like 5 or 6 versions of it. and i haven't even looked up what the mormons did to them yet. at any rate, the basics are there. don't lie, don't steal, don't kill, put god first, be good to the 'rents, don't covet, don't commit adultery, etc, etc. the end. for now. at church group tonight we got into a brief discussion about the gospels that aren't gospels. the gospel of thomas is... um.. interesting. if you're a misogynist anyway. how about this quote? "simon peter said to them, let mary leave us, for women are not worthy of life. Jesus said "i myself shall lead her in order to make her male, so that she too may become a living spirit resembling you males. for every woman who will make herself male will enter the kingdom of heaven." yeah, and people wonder why this stuff got left out.
Saturday, July 2nd, 2005
8:26 am	my news Ok, so firstly, I moved. I live in Hyde Park now, in my own little efficiency. It's been rough getting everything together, but all in all, it's been well worth it. I really like my place. Once I get a few more things cleaned up and cleared out, I'll post some pictures. And secondly, I have a new job starting Tuesday. But Kelly, you ask, What About Your Old Job? Well, I just gave my notice yesterday, so I'll be working both jobs for two weeks. Which means the previously promised pictures will probably take awhile to show up. Cause I'll be working 12 hour days. The plan is to work the new job in the morning, and the old job in the afternoon. And then starting on the 18th or so, I'll just work the new job full time. It's fun. It's exciting. It's completely overwhelming, especially since I'm still finishing up my XHTML/Javascript class. I guess we'll see what happens... This is really a warning that I may be cranky for the next couple weeks. Anyway, that's my news. Have an happy, exciting, and EXPLOSIVE 4th of July! P.S. old joke: Does England have the 4th of July?
Sunday, June 26th, 2005
8:54 am	i wrote my state representative... and this is what i said: Hello, I certainly do not have any legal expertise, but I am hoping that the State of Texas will take a stand against the overreaching Supreme Court ruling on eminent domain by passing a law to limit the ability of state and local governments to seize property. I find it disconcerting that local residents and even local businesses can be displaced for a big box store or other private interest. I understand the need for eminent domain in public works projects (my great-grandmother's farmhouse had a highway built through it) but I fear situations where local governments have money thrown at them by big interests, and local residents and local businesses lose out. I would ask that you draft or support measures that would limit those kinds of occurences. Thank you. I suggest you write a similar letter, if you care about this issue at all.
Friday, June 17th, 2005
11:45 pm	the war on drugs? http://blogs.salon.com/0002762/stories/2003/08/17/drugWarVictims.html Yeah. It's just not right.
Saturday, June 11th, 2005
5:29 pm	jubilee OH MY. G8 just cancelled 100% of the debt in 18 third world countries. i remember perry farrell talking about jubilee 2000 a few years ago and how they were pushing for that very thing to happen so that third world nations could use the money they did have to jump start their economy and fix healthcare and educational systems. i can't believe it actually happened. is there a downside? is this gonna all fall through? i'm just... totally amazed.
Monday, June 6th, 2005
11:27 pm	and by request So I guess I should announce that I'm getting my own place. Of course, it's a small, kinda cramped place, but it's going to be 1) cheaper 2) closer to work 3) closer to church and 4) mine all mine. I'll be in Hyde Park starting end of June sometime. I don't really need any help or anything, so don't you crazy Austin kids worry about it. The other things that happened recently is that I started two classes, and I've already dropped one of them. I was taking Calculus I and it really got overwhelming. Working full time and taking hard classes does not work very well. It's not that I could theoretically do all the work... I would just have to give up my friends, my social life, my boyfriend, any and all hobbies and free time in order to do all the work. So I'm down to one class. A webscripting/design/programming class. Expect site redesigns of moderndaymonsters.com by the end of July. The other, other thing is that I'm having a horrible time with spyware I can't get rid of. I'm really upset about it cause I'm getting popunders and it's randomly popping me out of when I'm typing (like now) and it's really frustrating. Nothing I've done seems to stop it, as soon as I try to edit the registry it shows back up, all the spyware/adware programs I've tried were useless as well, so I'm trying to deal with how to fix this stuff. I'm just going to keep trying. I can't really reinstall or anything. Sigh. Ok, well, I've updated. Hooray?
Tuesday, May 17th, 2005
11:45 pm	mexico this previous weekend i went to monterrey mexico with my friend ben and my more-than-a-friend ra. i cannot even start to outline all the adventures. suffice it to say that there were many obstacles along the way, and we overcame them all. i learned how to say contact lens in spanish, and had, hands down, the best cheapest food i've had in my life. though i didn't drink the water. if you would like to peruse some of the pictures i took, just follow this link and take a look. we really did have a lot of fun and i'm sooo glad i went. the only thing that freaked me out, and i hope someone will be able to explain, is why there were at least two shoe stores on every block. i just don't get it. anyway, i'm gonna watch a lot of star wars tomorrow, and then i start classes next week. i bet this livejournal will be increasingly ignored....

Tuesday, May 10th, 2005
9:59 am	another coworker quote "did i ever tell you the story about JB Weld and my dad's nipple ring?" -Cleo
Monday, May 2nd, 2005
10:51 am	updates in the last three days, i have: registered for classes for the summer made $100 off of ebay helped jeremy move watched two movies and otherwise spent time with an intruiging boy fixed my passenger side brake light in the parking lot of walmart gone to the pecan street festival.. twice chilled at eeyore's birthday, and hula-hooped, and got funnel cakes and popsicles played with a 7 month old baby named madison found an error in ben's flight schedule for his trip down in a week or so harvested and eaten my first green bean crop from my garden it's been a fun and wonderful few days. i'm busy and happy. it's nice. i hope it continues.
Wednesday, April 20th, 2005
10:01 am	I smell like.. I smell like avon skin so soft. I SMELL LIKE AVON SKIN SO SOFT AND IT WILL NOT STOP. I put it on yesterday to work in the garden, because it is skin so soft bug guard and sunscreen. An important combination for my outdoor work. But it will not relent, it fills up my nose and... .. reminds me of being a girl scout, disliked, pushed out of games, sleeping in gross bunkbed in a rickety cabin in the middle of the woods, quietly making my way out in the dark in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom in a hole in the ground. Waking up at 7am to help make breakfast, wearing a sweater that was never warm enough, with the campsite wrapped in fog. Always with that smell. Keeps the bugs away, grandma says. Always with that smell.
Sunday, April 10th, 2005
7:47 pm	holy napping batman i just woke up from a nap. i was woken up, actually. someone actually called me. but i needed to be woken up anyway, even if i had already eaten and did not need to go anywhere. i'd rather be invited than sleep. i'm still half asleep right now which is why i'm writing this. i read comic books before i fell asleep, part of the sandman universe though not the series. neil gaiman did a remake of a japanese tale of a monk and a fox. i also read the second death book. i've read a lot lately. thank you to all the people who gave me book recommendations, willingly or otherwise (i may have, sorta, combed through your webpages to find books i would like). this week i've read: two arthur c. clarke books (city and the stars and the sands of mars), a cowboy bebop manga, brave new world, the two graphic novels mentioned earlier, and i'm 300 pages into the mismeasure of man, which is an awesome book but slow reading. i also got out of the library some orson scott card, william gibson, bill bryson, and jonathan lethem that i haven't attacked yet. i bought even more books at garages sales. what's most amazing to me is that the people i know, or at least the people that i either talk to or read webpages about, all have really good taste in books. because no less than half of what was recommended to me was nearly impossible to find. checked out, checked out, lost, etc. wow. but hooray for libaries nonetheless, they're the cheapest way to spend my time. i bought a $10 movie camera yesterday, it's takes 8mm film reels that are nearly impossible to track down. when i do buy said reels, i don't even know what i'm going to do with them. what should i film? i have no vision at all. but i have the projector, so when all is said and done, i have a way to share the vision i don't yet have. i auditioned for a band this week. i don't really know if they liked me. i don't really know if i'm sure about them. but the feeling of singing with a band was really cool. you never really know if you like something until you try it. that's why i try a lot of things (excluding illegal substances and sketchy foods). but i figured i would. i'm glad sometimes i do know myself. as i was falling asleep i realized that my life keeps falling apart because i'm trying to build a sandcastle without any water. but i don't even know what the water is. i think my subconscious is going back under where it belongs. i'm going to try to wake up for real now. let's see what happens this week.
Friday, April 8th, 2005
7:00 pm	no explanation needed. My coworker: Yeah, I knew 5 people that graduated from Abeline that were illiterate. Fortunately, one of them taught himself how to read using Penthouse Forum.
Sunday, April 3rd, 2005
8:25 pm	high treason So I'm at my friend's house the other night, and there's probably four or five people chilling as well. There's a keg on the porch that no one wants to drink, and we can't think of anything to do. My friend is high as a kite and half laying down when all of a sudden he goes "I know. Let's commit treason!" and we're all like "what?" and he then goes "Yeah, man. High treason. Cause we're hiiigh." Of course, I'm not high, cause, you know, I never am, but this struck me as the most hilarious thing I've heard all week. I should note that all of our ideas on how exactly to commit treason were rather lame, and all those that weren't lame were impossible to commit in the space of one night. My insistance that we really needed a ship didn't help the situation at all. But there you go. As for the pope, and I do believe the pope needs to be mentioned, I'm a little sad about it. But he was old, and he'd been the pope for like, forever, and he was sick as well. So it was his time, and I hope he's doing well kicking about heaven or wherever. I was actually Catholic growing up (and if I ever seem excessively guilty, now you know why...) so the pope kinda means something to me. I'm also glad he pushed that Schiavo chick out of the news. And I'm curious as to who the new pope will be... It's never been a process I've seen before. I may choose to pay attention to it. I guess I should also say that I'm doing better in my personal life, though certainly not well. I'm still walking around with this vague ache inside, but I'm able to eat again. Which is good, since I really don't want to lose any of the weight I've "worked" so hard to put on. Yeah. Life is not easy sometimes. P.S. I need book recommendations. Anybody have any??
Thursday, March 31st, 2005
9:09 am	yeah, so i've been having a rough week. i guess i should just come out and spew all of it, since this is a blog and all. basically, i got a speeding ticket, and that was bad. but then i had a party and that was good. then my boyfriend and i had a long discussion that same night, and that was bad. i bought a dresser and organized my room, and that was good. then my boyfriend decided he didn't want to be my boyfriend anymore, and he dumped me. so i feel crummy. i don't think i'll ever post the sxsw roundup like i wanted to. oh well.
Monday, March 21st, 2005
8:56 am	I had this real weird dream night before yesterday, and I woke up wanting to read childhood's end by arthur c. clarke. So I pulled out the book yesterday afternoon, plopped down in the sunshine in my backyard, and read it. It's not a upbeat story to say the least. Then, by coincidence, I was reading fark. They were talking about the hydrogen cars that are going to come out in 2012. Then someone else mentioned that the world's going to end in 2012, according to the mayas. Which brings us to Exit Mundi. It's a collection of scenarios about the end of the world, which are mostly "for fun". Which it is, mostly fun. I was especially intrigued to learn that in Islam's end of the world scenario, Jesus comes back from the dead, denounces Christianity, and commands an army for Islam. Weird, man. I would like to point out that I think Revelation is most likely allegory. It's possible that it could happen, and if it does I'll be glad I have the knowledge of it. But even my bible notes there are four kinds of interpreters: Preterists, who consider all events to have already taken place; Historicists, who think we're in the middle of the story, as the story stretches to the end of time; Futurists, (these would be your end of the world preachers) who think it's a legitimate end story; and Idealists, who view it as a story of good's ultimate triumph over evil. So there you go. Anyway, my point is, the end of the world could come fairly rapidly, and it could have nothing to do with scrolls or seals or beasts or trumpets. Read that site. About half the stuff under "earth" and "science" are fairly alarming. Read the Oil Peak link. Doesn't it scare you, just a little? I don't know about you, but I feel like buying 40 acres and a mule. Yeah. Alright, so, I hope I didn't ruin anybody's day with this. As for me, stay tuned to this journal for an upcoming SXSW review. It'll be fun. No disasters required.
Tuesday, March 8th, 2005
9:07 pm	picture of a picture i was creating some "real-life" photo albums for myself tonight and i found this picture. there's not a whole lot of journal entry that needs to go with it... suffice it to say, i was 16 and in texas. my father lived in arkansas and my sister and i took a little mini-tour of texas with him one (really freakin' warm) summer. i also want to publicly apologize for any erratic behavior i've exhibited lately. i'm not doing so well sorting things out. it's gonna be fine, and no, i don't want to talk about it.
Sunday, February 27th, 2005
7:22 am	metaphysically delicious i am an insufficient god to my fish. i can tell he wishes not to worship me.
Tuesday, February 1st, 2005
2:59 pm	summer blockbuster i have too much time on my hands today. and ben just like to waste time on silly projects.... thus... our movie poster for a movie that doesn't (and will never) exist.
Friday, January 28th, 2005
10:01 am	the paper in his hand I was driving home from the optometrist and as I was sitting at the light at 38th some black dude in a suit came up to my window with some newspapers. I decided, eh, why not, and I handed the guy a dollar in quarters. Grabbed my paper and went on my way. But I had purchased no ordinary paper. I now own a copy of "The Final Call" put out by Minister Louis Farrakhan. I can't really say much about the paper since I haven't read most of it yet. I can't say much about the man since I don't know how much of it's true. Wikipedia seemed to think some of his worst comments were taken out of context. Maybe that's accurate, maybe not. I definitely feel as though the paper is not for me... since I'm not muslim nor particularly "dedicated to the resurrection of black men and women in america and the world." And I do think reparations are a little much to expect at this point. But I know this world is racist in all directions... and I do wish people would stand up, open up, and look to the future of mankind instead of the limited scope of their lives. When I brought the paper home, I showed my roommate and he was less than thrilled. I believe his exact words were "I'm not just making stuff up, Kelly. I've watched him talk and he believes in the white devil. You gave money to somebody that hates you." Well, you know what? Plenty of people hate me. People hate me because I'm white, because I'm american, because I'm too Christian, and because I'm not Christian enough. I am hated because I am educated, and I am hated because I was not educated in the right kind of places. People hate me because I make less money than they do, and because I make more money than they do. I am hated because I am from NY, I am hated because I live in Texas. People hate me because of where I was born, because of the music I listen to, because of the music I don't listen to. People hate me because I don't speak their language. People hate me because I don't follow their rules. I am hated because I don't always stick to my own socioeconomic/ethnic group when making friends. People hate me because I grew up catholic, because now I'm protestant, because I wear jeans and t-shirts, and because I am a woman. People hate me because I have a job. People hate me because I know how to say "no." People hate me because they feel I did them wrong. People hate me because they just feel like hating me. And I love them all anyway. No paper, no opinion, no flash of fire in anyone's eyes is going to change that.
Thursday, January 27th, 2005
10:57 pm	kidneys and needles don't mess with your kidneys, man. so i went to the doctor this morning because i thought i might have a bladder infection or something. i'd been drinking cranberry juice by the gallon for like days but it wasn't helping. and my back had been hurting... in a way that kinda reminded me of that time i had kidney stones. so i decided it was time to go get checked out. so the doctor takes a look at me (ok, mostly my urine) and determines that i probably have a bladder infection and that i'm well on my way to a kidney infection as well. that's... not good. he recommends an immediate shot of antibiotics. yeah, a shot. i hate shots. but i do like having a functional renal system, so i acquiesced. the nurse (male, i might add) comes in with the needle and it's huge. HUGE. so i start to roll up my sleeve, and the nurse goes "nope. this goes in your butt cheek." OMG. OMG OMG. but i managed. flopped over on my tummy and pulled my pants down a little and took it like a man. err.. girl. got my shot, got my bandaid. it hurt for hours. still's a little sore now. but my back's better, that's good right? so, that's my story. i still have kidneys. and a bladder. good things to have.
Monday, January 24th, 2005
9:05 am	falling up gravity, it's gravity that keeps me here. i'd rather float into the atmosphere.
Tuesday, January 18th, 2005
7:51 am	ecclesiastes: nihilism in the bible i'm in this... church small group thing, and the other night i was supposed to do a paraphrasing of ecclesiastes... the most depressing book in the bible. basically, it goes through how everything is meaningless. in detail. here's my super-academic paraphrasing: ecclesiastes 1 i'm a smart dude, and nothing means anything. we do a lot of work, do we gain anything? the earth and weather and stuff are gonna be around a lot longer than us and we're just bored, killing time, taking stuff in and there's nothing new, and we don't remember any of the old stuff and we're totally gonna be forgotten i'm like a phd in everything, and i can tell you, we're not really doing anything. and btw, the more you know, the more miserable you are. ecclesiastes 2 so i thought, why not, i'll just laugh and get high and chill. and i built some mansions, and had people bring me food and owned a bunch of casinos. i swam in a mountain of gold like scrooge mcduck and had aretha franklin do some soul for me and i hooked up with natalie portman. pretty cool, eh? turns out, not so much. i worked hard... and still wasn't satisfied. it didn't mean anything. it's good to be smart, but that doesn't matter much. we're all gonna die. so i decided life suxor, and i hated everything. then i figured we should just work hard and eat and drink and then god will be alright with you. and that's cool.
Monday, January 17th, 2005
6:33 pm	wonderbetta Today, I became one of the many people who replaced longing for something better with a moving yet non-sentient creature. I bought a betta fish. Also, a cactus. I used to a own a cactus. It was Woodstock 99 in Rome NY and me and my boyfriend at the time Andy crashed at his friend Scott's place after the show. Scott had been given the cactus by some kind of supervisor, and he hated it. It pricked him frequently and he, often spoken of as Scott the robot, saw no need to keep plants that injure. I have no issues liking things that injure, especially since all you need to do is handle them carefully. So I took it. It had a yellow devil on the side of the pot, and I repainted it into something less hell-oriented. I kept that cactus for three and a half years, and I would have kept it longer except it didn't fit in the van when I moved to Texas. My old roommate, Cristin, was going to mail it to me, but it didn't get sent to me for some reason. My life has been missing a cactus for over a year now. So I chose my cactus, which is shaped like a pear except for the long spikes coming out of it. I thought that would do it. I thought that would make me feel better. Except as I walked out of Walmart with my tiny cactus and my baking soda and peroxide toothpaste, I still felt not so great. I found myself inexplicably drawn towards Petsmart. Remember Evil Dead? Shop SMART, shop S-MART. It's like that. I owned a couple of betta fish in college. The first died within four days, during a visit from my exboyfriend from high school. That was the last time the fish was alive and that's the last time I saw Rob as well. Rob didn't kill the fish, but he was a fisherman in Maine last I knew. I don't even think the fish ever had a name. My second betta lasted much longer. Its name was Andy v2.0 Betta, after the Andy previously mentioned. I would like to say that I did not actually name the fish that. I named the fish something totally different, but my friends, being both geeks and busybodies, decided that name was much better. I went with it because arguing with that nerdy joke was futile. v2.0 lasted about two years. I took care of him for the first year, then gave him to my sister to keep for awhile. His most memorable adventure involved him slipping down the front of my dorm fridge during an attempt to fit him into a three liter root beer bottle. The bottle was filled with water, not root beer. I picked out a betta based mostly on how much it moved around. The one I chose seems pretty alive so far. I put him and the cactus in the cupholders in my car on the way home. It was important to remember to not hit the cactus when I reached for my stereo. But they made it. And I've decided to name my new pet Gunter the Wunderfish. My friend Evans lives on Gunter St. And it'll be a freaking wonder if he doesn't die on me. The cactus is as of yet unnamed. Here's some pictures. Have a rockin' MLK day.